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  • Writer's pictureViktoryia Biheza Ferretti

Is Your Negative Self-Talk Fueling Anxiety?

Anxiety is common, unpleasant and manifests in many ways, starting from racing thoughts and worrying and ending with heart palpitations and chest pains. But how does it all start? and, more importantly, how do we end it?
 There is genetic predisposition that poses more risk to developing symptoms, however environment and levels of stress as well as our resilience and coping ability have huge impact.
 What is negative self-talk and how do we get rid of it? One of driving forces of anxiety is undoubtedly perfectionism and high expectations. Did you grow up with a lot of pressure, criticism and expectations? Chances are you are hard on yourself (and others) too. As such, everything is your fault:" I should have tried harder," "If only, then," "I could have, but," etc. etc. So there are never circumstances or chance or luck or accident or someone else that predisposed the outcome of a situation but it is always (another word to watch out for) your fault for whatever happened. Anxiety is also tightly connected with feelings of being in control, so accepting something as "just as is" means to let go of some of that control, which can be scary and uncomfortable.
 So what to do? Reframe your negative self-talk! Challenge it, look for evidence, accept not having full control over circumstances most of the time, explore if your anxiety is productive-driving you to positive change like a new job- or unproductive- when you find yourself stuck in cyclical negative thinking without any outcome. Track your thoughts and feelings that accompany them and look at other possibilities, without self-blame. Contact me for a free copy of cognitive-behavioral daily thought record and stay well!

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